Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

How good do you sing and how do you know this?

It’s still here.

I had run out of hope.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Why do I want to suck cock tonight?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

What happens when your partner doesn't see the value in you and continuously hurts you by searching for something in others knowing it hurts you?

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Why am I so tired of seeing homeless people all over the place?

The sadness was still there.

It’s here now, writing to you.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

Trump is shot, tackled by SS agents, yet then stands, defiant, with fist high, and 52 hours later, walks into the Republican Convention to thunderous applause. Is there anything that can stop this man, who loves his country? Does he get your vote?

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

And the sadness?

How are Hinduism and Sikhism related, considering they both originated in Punjab, India?

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Is it wise to SECRETLY expose a narcissist by telling others that he/she is a covert narcissist?

Be who you already are.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

I was tired of fighting.

How do I build muscle easily with isometrics?

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

You are like me, then.

What are some downsides to living in Newfoundland and Labrador (besides the weather)?

I was tired of trying and failing.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.